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May 01, 2007

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Great post. Handling the "recoil" reaction is , in my opinion as a quadripegic, not just a one step process (not that I'm saying you or these authors are saying that) . It's actually multistep like a "coming out" process because there's the wheelchair with me that people see and they assume that I'm a paraplegic . Then if they see my arms are paralyzed there's a recoil reaction - or with a spasm there can be another recoil reaction. Or they may find out a bit of info and then recoil. Some folks visbily recoil at one part and not another - or not at all. Some days it's like "steeling myself" to be around multiple recoils and others I feel as if "oh well here we go again" . I do empathize with the recoil to a point. ..and don't discount people from interaction because of it but it can wear one down as you're trying to work, have a life, etc. I find humor works best when I am feeling worn out by it.

Hi Ruth,

Of course, the recoil has got to be tiresome for the subject to whom it is directed. It's a constant struggle with me, when I see a disabled person on TV or in person, to measure my recoil and allow it without castigating myself, and then to attempt a return to the subject but not as an observer of the "freak," but as a participant in the discourse itself. Quite challenging!

Thanks for reading and commenting.

Thanks for putting into words the 'recoil' ... which many of us deal with every day.

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